Ideas

I wonder who creates the ideas in your head. I know they are shaped by what you've heard and what others have told you, but what puts your opinion there in the first place? How do we develop what we think about things. How do we see things differently from other people? Sure we have all grown up different ways, but how does that change how we see things in the world. Is there really a reality out there? It doesn't seem like it most of the time. If there really is one reality, how is it possible that everyone can see something completely different when they look at the same thing? Although, maybe they see the same thing but they make something different out of it. It is so easy to communicate with some people, and so difficult to communicate with others. It is so simple to talk to my sister who has had basically all the same experiences as me throughout her life. Yet, how do I really know we are talking about the same thing? Does she see what I'm seeing when we are looking at the same thing? Is it really the same thing from two different sets of eyes? I have no idea. I think I have such an interest with words and language because I cannot understand how we can communicate at all. Even when we do communicate it is so ineffective. I can sit and watch people misunderstand each other in everyday situations and know what each of them is thinking and why they thought that way or the other. I wish I could explain the misunderstandings to everyone, but they happen way too frequently. How is there any way for me to share my experience with you as it happened to me. You have no idea about how I explain things, how I see things. When I really think about it, it makes me feel very isolated. I cannot express to you what I see in any clear way because there is no way for you to see it as I do. You haven't had the experiences I've had. Communicating with another person is like analyzing literature. You have to look into the author's past, how they use certain conventions, and what they mean when they say certain things. Nothing someone says is simply what they said. You have to know my past, my dreams, my faults, my insecurities, and my ignorance to understand what I'm talking about, to really know what I mean. It is all very frustrating.
But really, how do you form the ideas in your head. There are so many things running through my mind where I have no idea how or when they were placed there. A few of them I can fish out, but so many others I have no clue. Where did they come from? Are you born with certain ideas? Sure your family or lack there of put some kind of values and thoughts in there, but how do you form that opinion? What makes you think negatively while others think positively? How can I see that everything is connected and someone else can't? I wish I could show those who can't, but would they even want to see? Would they believe it if they did? Everything can seem so clear to me and make absolutely no sense to someone else. I wonder if there is any truth to the clarity that I feel I can see. If I cannot show anyone else then what is the use of it? So many people cannot see the connections, does that mean it doesn't exist? But then again, some can. This all seems rather crazy when I write it out.